The 7 Deadly Sins

These are: Gluttony (greed), envy, jealousy, pride, anger, sloth (laziness), and… how is it that the last thing is always so damn hard to remember? 80-20 rule again, I suppose. Anyway, if you’re African like me, you obviously don’t think too much about these rules, or place too much importance in them. More colonialist waffle. In fact, if you think about it, we embrace them as being good. Why else do we choose leaders that have these qualities? We see these qualities in our leaders and we see ourselves in our leaders. They are just like us. We see no harm in these qualities. We think that capitalism and the western world also embrace these qualities. These qualities define selfish, narcissistic and ultimately destructive behaviour, as opposed to humility, tolerance, patience and creative behaviour which are always for the greater good of the community and the earth itself. So what? The issue is that, for decades, civilized man had developed an “internal compass” based on certain rules to inhibit these qualities in us. Take religions, which have always been fairly dominant in civilizations, especially uneducated ones. All the religions promote the same behaviours destined to support social cohesion and community peace. This allows people to work together on a large scale, even a national scale. People subvert their selfish interests for the community interests, which ultimately is in their interests too. Over time they begin realizing this and naturally start working in the interests of the community. “Positive” humanistic behaviour is encouraged and looked up to. However, us Africans never really went through this, so we haven’t developed the internal compass. What this means is no empathy with animals or people, and no internal reasoning to not behave totally selfishly and without regard for others or the community. Of course, education helps. But most of us don’t get it. Throughout history our behaviour has only been controlled through fear, by witch doctors and ruthless chiefs. There has been no real understanding of why we should behave in community ways. We see no reason why we shouldn’t have a ruthless, greedy leader for our country, and if all our parliamentarians are fat, corrupt gluttons that’s good, because we see nothing wrong and would do exactly the same in their shoes. Our solution it seems, is legislation. But it can’t work. Ask any businessman – if you can’t trust your employees, and they don’t have the right attitude and aren’t aligned to organisational goals, you are dead in the water. You can make rules and impose security till you’re blue in the face, but things will not work out. People must guide themselves, but this requires an internal compass which encourages positive community behaviour. South Africa is a lost cause. Dead in the water. Destined to a Zuma future. An uneducated leader who has just helped me remember what the last deadly sin is. Lust. The ultimate embodiment of everything unsocial and uncivilized in a human being. So I guess our destiny is now staring us in the face, more or less assured. Another country of warring baboon troops, each led by a big, strong and ruthless dictator. Was there ever any other answer? Could an African country ever subvert the 7 deadly sins sufficiently to emerge as a united, successful and prosperous community? Let’s hope one of our neighbours can get it together and show us the way. Lets hope one day we’ll have the humility to follow their lead.

SARS Expcts Way Too Much of Us

I saw an advert where SARS doesn’t want Any supporting documentation from the Taxpayer, but expect the taxpayer to keep it for five years. Then when SARS come knocking you have to produce it. This is ridiculous. Imagine a person like me, who as a matter of necessity is mobile. I stay 3 months here, 6 months there, never sure what the future holds. People get cross with me and burn all my stuff. I lose the stuff n a rain fall and floods. The chances of my records lasting 5 years is very small. I suppose its lucky I don’t pay tax, because clearly I couldn’t, and I suppose I really shouldn’t. But sometimes I really feel I should contribute in some way, especially since theoretically it’s illegal not to….

Farming vs Golf Estates

The minister of agriculture recently expressed his/her concern about the number of golfing estates affecting the amount of agricultural land. He has every reason to be concerned. Traveling around the country you might discover places like Pringle Bay, a pristine piece of coastal land which has been scarred by a rash of indivualisticly and tastelessly styled houses. A sort of Rustenburg by die See. And how many people actually there when you visit? If there’s one in the hundreds of houses there, it’s a lot. Maybe there’ll be more in december. So effectively we have a ghost town, owned by very rich city dwellers. Why on earth can’t these city dwellers stay in a guest house? It much nicer, everyone does everything for you, and much, much cheaper. I wouldn’t understand, being African and not a Rustenburger. You might also discover the Thabazimbi area, where all the cattle farmers have discovered they can make their fortunes by selling the land for eco-estates. So it seems rich people are buying up the land for their empty holiday homes, and poor farmers are selling up. The result just has to be, however you look at it, much more expensive food in the future, much more risky food supply dominated by a few large producers, and plenty of starving people who can now still afford food, but are less likely to in the future. So the rich will starve the poor to death. They’ll use all the drinking water to water their golf courses. This in my book spells national disaster, and the sooner the government moves to put a stop to it the better.

Port Nelson Mandela

I was in Port Nelson Mandela recently. I understand it’s still officially called Port Elizabeth, but I’m sure not for long. It turns out that Elizabeth was the wife of some British colonialist. Why on earth he didn’t call it Port Pete or whatever his name was beats me. Maybe that’s a reason why he had such a nice wife. I wouldn’t understand, not being a British colonialist. I’m sure no African in history ever called anything after his wife, that’s for certain. Anyway, Port Nelson Mandela is much better. In fact Port Elizabeth is offensive to me personally. All whites offend me. It so happens that just about everything in Port Elizabeth is called Nelson Mandela. If you ever want to go somewhere interesting , just say Nelson Mandela something, eg “Nelson Mandela museum”, or “Madiba Bay”. I think Nelson Mandela now has at least 2 of everything named after him, and probably about 1000 roads nationally. Anyway, I visited St Georges Park (I assume they haven’t delivered the signs yet). There was this memorial to dead colonialists, complete with statue of terrorist (colonialist soldier) in battle with gun. (how come its so hard to call a colonialist soldier a terrorist? I suppose because they’re always dressed smartly, like soldiers. There’s surely no other difference. Then the official definitions should be: Terrorist – undisciplined, badly dressed fighter. Soldier – disciplined, smartly dressed fighter) For some reason, someone had painted the memorial and it was looking good. Obviously the colonialist remnants were hanging in there at the municipality. I pictured a statue of Nelson Mandela in his suit in its place. Then I pictured a ragged comrade war vet with an AK in its place. Somehow, though, the place won’t be the same. I also discovered, again surprisingly, that the gardens had been beautifully maintained, even the old, tasteful colonialist features had been preserved. How offensive. I sat in the beautiful gardens, listening to happy birds, and was offended. Why? Was it Envy? That it was colonialists who had made this? We have to unmake it, make it African. I pictured mielies instead of flowers, a sand patch surrounding a well, or a wood pole cattle kraal. Would we be losing something by Africanising this place? We’ll surely find out soon enough.

Being a Better European

I sometimes get piece work with a catering company owned by a colonialist invader.
Recently he had got a very big job, and took me down to Port Elizabeth to help out. As it turned out, the client was a government department. So we set up a large hall, which took 2 days, and it was magnificently decorated. Then we arranged the food for the 500+ guests, and again, everything went according to clockwork. The colonialist was very particular about how things should be, as he always is. Us workers can often not see his reasoning , or understand why he’ so particular about certain things, but he’s the boss. The evening of the function, there were other service providers, including a brother MC, a band of brothers and sisters (actually sister, but she was so magnificently large you may as well say sisters),and of course, the guys from the govt department who also had various things to organize,such as speeches and prize giving. Now the reason we don’t understand why the colonialist does what he does, is because he’s a white of European descent, an we’re black of African descent. In fact, everything my boss organized went smoothly and professionally, and almost everything else was a disaster – the MC was confused and messed up the awards, as were the govt officials, and most of their organized awards ceremony was in total disarray. The music was way too loud and inappropriate and everyone ate dinner while getting an ear blasting. The speeches were interminably long and boring. And why was this? Because this was a pseudo-European function. We Africans are unlikely to organize or even understand, a European function as well as the Europeans. And when things go wrong, we get jealous of the Europeans, and even blame them. This explains so much of Africa. It explains why affirmative action and racial quotas are such a remarkably short sighted and arrogant thing for us to do. Now let me paint a picture of how we Africans could actually succeed, and beat the world at their own game. First, we embrace the rejection of the 7 deadly sins, teach them to our children, concentrate on the teachings of great people like Biko and Mandela and Tutu. This is important since civilization is based on these norms. You can’t work together without it. There are, of course, many great whites we could use, and hopefully we can find sufficient humility to admit to ourselves how great these people are and embrace their teachings too, but maybe that’s too much too soon for us. Then we become proud of being Africans. We concentrate on our strengths. Then we acknowledge our fellow beings on earth, acknowledge their right to be their, forgive them all their sins, hold no more grudges about past grievances. Most importantly, we respect them! We respect the whites and acknowledge their strengths, same with the coloureds, Indians and Chinese. No more do we think we are better than them. Nor do we think we are worse. However, we can assume we’re better Africans than them. But this does not make us superior, it makes as merely a fellow being.

If we ever get this far, the rest is easy. We have weaknessesand strengths, which differ from those of other nations – obviously generalizing here, but you get the idea. We team up with them to form diverse, but united teams. Now you may say that Afrikaners, for example, are way too arrogant to team up with Africans. That may be so, because they are an arrogant bunch, but then leave them out of the mix. There are plenty of other, more humble nations willing to team up. As an aside, Afrikaners do tend to band together at the expense of their fellow other nationalities, especially in companies such as Eskom. Ever walked up to a group of Afrikaners, and as soon as you arrive a tense silence overcomes them? Then they talk in a stilted way when you’re around. As soon as they think you’re out of earshot, they revert to being pally with each other. Talk about being unable to mix with other nationalities! Understand that this is their problem, not yours.

Take rugby for instance. We have a world class team, and I don’t care how many blacks you put in the team, they will almost surely not match up to a team of mostly Afrikaners. Similarly, blacks are much better at athletics and soccer. Whites at swimming. And so on. And the same can be said for academic subjects and work careers. Blacks make excellent journalists, historians, politicians, negotiators, entrepreneurs. Whites make good engineers and accountants. I have seen how blacks struggle with engineering, when it comes so easily and naturally to whites. Whites are excellent managers and administrators, with less tendencies to be individualistic.

The whites are now in our power. Why not use them to our and (gasp) their advantage? To all our advantage? Make them and us rich and happy. Have vibrant and safe cosmo cities – everyone loves the feel and vibrancy of a mixed area. They’re here – take advantage! In fact, I’ve just thought of how to solve the crime problem – hire the whites as security guards and police. They appreciate security so would probably make a much bigger effort than us. But of course, this is all pie in the sky. I mustn’t forget how nasty the whites are, and how much they owe us, and me personally, etc, etc…

Career Choices

I’ve been wondering how come I make such a good criminal, and such a hopeless employee. The obvious reason is if you’re self employed in something that excites you, it’s natural to be good at it, enjoy it and keep doing it. You take pride in it. I often think I should be living 1000 years ago, when I could be a great warrior for my tribe. I would also love hunting, pillaging and plundering the evil enemy. Things would be dangerous and tough, and we’d develop into quality people, look after our friends. Alternatively, I’d love to be in an army trying to free my countrymen from invaders, trying to do good, with the moral high ground, like Zanu or Umkhonto. And I know I’d be good at it. Maybe that’s it – I’m like an alien living on the wrong planet. Can’t fit in, can’t get by in this environment. Have to lose myself dreaming on the internet on how things should be…

Shebeen Talk – Oprah

We were getting trashed in the shebeen last night, and it wasn’t even 8pm when I noticed that an unusual quiet had fallen on us all. The kind of quiet that normally happens at around midnight when we’re all drunk, out of funds and depressed because we’ve got nothing more to say and have to think about going home to sleep and a massive hangover. Actually, I only noticed the quiet during an ad break, because we were all watching the TV that normally just chats away in the background. And what was so fascinating to us? Unbelievably, I know, Oprah Winfrey. Now I always thought, as does everyone else, that Oprah is just another fat rich American Talk Show Host. You know, like Jerry Springer and Ricky Lake. The lowest form of life on earth, just below the Malaysian Blood Sucking Leech. In fact, those Talk Show Hosts can be considered completely useless except if maybe they’re hosting such a leech, and thereby, at least contributing something environmentally to the food chain. But here was Oprah saying things that made sense. Things you wanted to listen to. She showed the first signs of intelligence when she remarked on a meeting she had had with Mandela, and the effect it had on her. Now, somehow, greatness recognises greatness, so this was an indication that she wasn’t quite what she seemed. As it turns out, she’s busy building a school for disadvantaged girls in Meyerton. And even the fact that it was exclusively for girls, and not boys like me, did not detract from what a wonderful thing it was to do. Instead of giving her money to the government or some charity to squander, she was personally building a school. Somehow you know its going to make a real difference. And no one in te shebeen did not love her for it. I reckon we would even have loved her if we were white.

Its embarrassing to compare her to our array of fat politicians.Ok, you can relie on Thabo and trvor, and even Tito, to talk wisely. They’re cut from the same cloth. But the rest of them are a disgrace. How come haven’t we got an Oprah for health minister? Instead of manto having pathetic, tit for tat squabbles with Tony Leon about the whiteness of his party, while the country dies of Aids. Or instead of Ngakula, telling everybody that they should accept crime because its not so bad, while we in Diepsloot have to hide any valuable we possess very well, or we won’t have it more than a week. And if its really valuable, like a TV or a new car, we’ll probably end up dead over it, and nobody will even know, never mind care.

Talking of greatness, I have to wonder t the fact that possibly the greatrest of this century so far happens to be black like me – madiba. Very encouraging. Its true we make the greatest, most ruthless dictators, and the greediest capitalists. But we can be the best human beings too! Hope I won’t hav toendure 27 yearts in jail before I make it to that stage though…

Talking of fatness, its obviously no secret why both Americans and our politicians are so fat – they take a large proportion of the world’s resources and stuff it down their gullets. That’s fine, but I really don’t understand why they don’t exercise and diet to get thin. Surely the quality of life from being thin exceeds the quality achieved by eating large quantities of expensive food? Surely spending less time eating and more time doing mor exciting things would improve the quality of life? I suppose I’ll only understand when I achieve the same status, but the thought of it makes me think I’d rather be thin in Diepsloot than fat in parliament or USA. Maybe there’s some advantage to being fat that I’m not aware of. Maybe its like walking around surreounded by cushions or airbags…

2010

I get so excited when I see the SABC add to come together and make 2010 a success. Similarly, after Mbeki’s Origins Centre speech, I was temporarily on a high, just imagining us all coming together to make this country great. Putting aside our selfish, petty little problems with each other, putting aside our little envy problems and material desires. Imagine the incredibly diverse people in the country uniting. The potential is limitless. And sometimes Mbeki seems to be the guy to do it. But then reality collapses on your head. Just at the point when you realise, “ITS NOT FOR YOU!”. It wasn’t said to you, for you, and you aren’t welcome to be part of it. You are one of the unwelcome fringes. You’re not the black SA businessman, director, middle class suburb dweller, ANC member or black SA woman. You’re Indian, or coloured, or Zimbabwean, or (gasp) white male the lowest of the low. Or you’re me. A black unemployed shack dweller who has never paid tax, never had a bank account, never been part of the New SA. And it looks like he never will be. The guy watching things happen from the sidewalk. Or the shebeen. Uninvolved and non-contributing. You can never apply for all these jobs which are all Affirmative Action Only. You can never take up these student bursaries for black South Africans Only. It’s a disappointment to see you coming to apply for a job. In fact, people would really prefer it if you weren’t there at all, if you just didn’t exist to complicate their lives. (thank God for this shebeen – I think I need another quart right now). You just spend your days hoping to receive your free house built by some AA contractors (Really you wish you could build it yourself, at least you’d feel you’re doing something creative). Mbeki isn’t referring to me. Nor is the SABC. They couldn’t give a damn what I do or don’t do, so long as I don’t interfere in the great 2010 organisation and preparation. I suppose that’s why the only part I’ll play is mugging the surprised Koreans of their digital cameras. At least I know most of the police force are as depressed and demotivated as me about it all. And they surely feel as alien as me too, despite their barcoded IDs. And the worst of it is, we all have no idea where we should go to be wanted. Barman, another and make it cold. However, I do hope whoever is shupposed to get it together for 2010 does sho, and ish a huge shucshess...

Housing Problem

So now, me and 1000 of my fellow beings, are wondering around in a quandary, with no shack to live in. The problem is that our "leaders" have made some kind of deal or something with the police and government. However, we are now completely homeless, and no doubt will have to try to move to another squatter camp. We will all also have to collect together R2000 of shack materials to build new shacks. This is a very depressing thought, since it took me about 6 months to build the last shack. This whole episode has been fairly disruptive, and one wonders if it couldn't have been done more creatively. For example, our leaders and the police could have come to us and said, please remove your shacks to this place and live there, and there would have been no objection from me. Others who do object can then be forcibly removed, but at least they are moved with their shack materials, and probably only lose about one day in the process. Best of all, of course, is to give everyone a piece of land somewhere where they can put up a shack, a house, or whatever and live in peace for ever more. But that would be far too caring a thing to do for our government to even comtemplate...

Red Ant Day

I have had a bit of a rough time recently. So have about 1000 people like me. The problem was that to days ago, in the morning, I get a call to say they're busy destroying our shacks. I get there too late. The Red Ants are busy with mine. The methodology is simple. Chase owner of shack away, threatening violence. Break the lock of the door, go inside and have a quick look for small valuables: Cash, cellphones, ID books, probably in that order of importance. Then pull the shack apart, with personal items and furniture still inside. Put all wall and door materials on truck and send away. Move on to next shack. Result: Tonight there is just a scene of devastation, personal items and furniture lying everywhere, people sifting through the stuff for their things and for cardboard or anything to make a shelter. The past two nights we've slept together in this huge shed, which the new property owner apparently didn't want to be torn down. Meanwhile people have lost everything, including R2000 of shack materials each. Many lost their ID books, so the police will insist on taking them off to Lindel detention camp as refugees. God alone knows which African neighbour they'll choose to send them to. I wonder how many SA citizens are wondering around in Zinbabwe after losing their ID books? Or worse, their ID book sits in their shack back in SA. This is one of the reasons the ID book is so valuable, and must be kept on your person at all times. The othre reason is that it enables you to get on to the mystery housing list - the list for people to get free houses. However, your name just never seems to get to the top, so you never actually get one. I always saw thw read ants on tv, ripping people's homes apart, but somehow the incredible sadness of it only hits home when you're actually part of it. I only had a mattress and blanket and a few pots and things in my shack. Others had everything they had collected over the last year. The women, especially, had all the things to help them be comfortable in a difficult environment. All destroyed in one morning. I have been incredibly depressed to see it - I certainly am not proud to be a SA citizen now. We are definitely well on our way to being a typical, uncaring, tyrannical society, and I want no part of it...

Taxi Recapitalisation

Why the government has decided to "recapitalise" the taxi industry is one of those great mysteries which no one can understand, so they just accept it, accept that somewhere is a rational explanation for it. I travel in a lot of taxis, and many of them are in excellent condition, some still new. I assume this recap program is to replace the proper thing to do, ie throw unroadworthy taxis off the road, and force them to becaome roadworthy, because thats too difficult. Getting bigger taxis has got to be the dumbest excuse, because you can overload that too. No, the current taxis have proven their excellence for the job, the industry has proven itself up to the task of providing transport which no one else can. Now if you could just get someone to do the Metro Cops job, there would be no excuse to waste time and money on recap programs.

Manto Again

I wasn't being sarcastic about Manto - I believe she really is doing the right thing. Also, some people can't understand why she has chosen those particular vegetables, but I'm fairly sure than anyone who does eat them will get more healthy. She's not as dumb as she behaves, and I for one am going to take her advice. Imagine if everyone substituted some of their usual diet of greasy chicken and pap (and beer, of course) for those vegetables, there's little doubt the nation will be more healthy. And a more healthy nation will mean less relience on multinational drug companies.

Rich Jerk vs Poor Jerk

I stumbled across the Rich Jerks website - http://www.therichjerk.com/. Its funny how this guy thinks, but maybe its normal. He definitely has an inferiority complex, because he goes on about being "better than you", I presume because he's rich. He clearly isn't educated, judging by his lifestyle. Educated people seem to prefer different things from uneducated ones. But the main point is whether its better to be like him or like me (poor), or something in between. Consider his "girlfriends". They are clearly the eye candy he describes them as, but I definitely would prefer my girlfriend to any or all of them. I can tell that by the way they behave - like Playgirls. Consider his car, a Ferrari. Its really nice, but I reckon the thrill wore off after about a week. I also reckon the thrill was equivalent to what I had when I got my second hand mountain bike. I still probably use it to get at least as much fun from as his ferrari. Consider his "Party House". I'm certain that many Saturday nights in the shebeen equal anything that goes on in the Party House, and probably often too. Consider his freedom that all that money gives him. Then consider the freedom I have being unemployed and out of the system": no tax, no people after my money, no lawyers, no advisors, no investments, no medical aid to worry about. The area he definitely is better off than me is in basics such as, for example, food. I spend a fair amount of time worrying about where to get a few rands for food, whereas he can stop at any take away anytime. There are times when I have no where to sleep, whereas he won't ever have that problem. We both have a lot of time on our hands. We both have to worry about crime - I have to literally sleep on top of my bike if I expect it to be there tomorrow, and I have to be fairly tough to stop it being simply taken from my possession. So I'm not certain the Rich Jerk is that much better off than me. But maybe if I was rich, but not a jerk...

A Heroine is Born

I see Manto is now under fire from the white colonialists:
http://www.iol.co.za/index.php?set_id=1&click_id=13&art_id=vn20060821101244617C573099
Manto must stand strong - she is demonstrating excellent African leadership qualities. Us in Diepsloot are very impressed with her totally belligerent African stance against logic and reason. This is the sign of a great African leader. They cen hold their head high, and even continue on a totally illogical course, in the face of cold reason. Manto doesn't believe in colonialist suppression tools such as science. She believed in speaking to the people, in African solutions, and in her heritage, as we all should. We don't need science, logic, etc, we managed for millions of years without it - we managed with the African potato and garlic. Firing Manto will be a huge mistake for Mbeki, the whole nation will then rise up against him. we like her, and maybe should should take her place in line for the next presidency.

Dysfunctional SA

There was a good article on Moneyweb spelling out the odds:
http://www.moneyweb.co.za/economy/economic_trends/936551.htm. What a hoo hah it created. On the one hand, the whites complaining and threatening to leave, on the other the blacks telling them to go, and saying emotionally charged and opinionated things. This is just so typical - us blacks use emotion to argue. Just the the Great JZ always seems to be doing Karaoke when we see him on TV, instead of saying something rational. What we say to the whites who don't like crime and AIDS is to simply get out of the country. We don't want to face the reality of the situation - they are completely right, we are turning this place into another dysfunctional African state. But so what? We should not try to change how we are or how we do things, because then we'll really screw up. Our African neighbours north of us have their problems, some quite serious, but we somehow get by. And yes, these countries are different with a definite African culture, which is exactly how it should be. Tourists love it that way. Crime is serious here now, but it will get better when we become more African - ie less to steal, everybody in same position (poor), etc. So its good for journalists to say it like it is, and let the whites know that yes, we are going the way of our African neighbour states. They won't like it, naturally, but its not the end of the world.

Car industry

We all know how many jobs are supported by the car industry, especially in aftermarket services and products such as tyres and petrol. Which seems to be the only reason people still drive expensive petrol taxis and cars. The problem with electric cars is thats its a very disruptive technology - it will cut the car sales figures by orders of magnitude, and destroy the multimillion rand fuel industry. Imagine - being able to convert your old scrap petrol car into electric. It will last forever, no longer need servicing nearly as often, and save you at least R10000 per year in fuel. Obviously something to be avoided at all costs by traditional economics people. But you can't hide from it forever, and the faster we all convert, the faster we'll save the environment, which really doesn't have time on its hands. Its really great being dirt poor, because I can make all these observations, and none of it affects me at all. I can't afford petrol, normally can't afford the taxi fare, and at this rate never will. But to those of you who have money and need more, take my advice: Buy up as many old, scrap petrol cars as you can. The electric conversion industry is about to rake off! Then send me a big cheque (at least R1 000, but use your discretion - I won't be unhappy if you send more) for that incredibly valuable pearl of info.